Praying for Myself

I started my day out this morning, praying for myself. I quickly turned this daily prayer to saying to myself, “Sherry,” how selfish are you for only praying for yourself when there is so much pain and sorrow in this world?

Each and every one of us has encountered pain and suffering in our life.  If we have been blessed to have lived long enough, most of us can recall negative life events we have encountered, whether unknowingly by our own hand or by some unforeseen circumstances. praying for myself There are some things I don’t understand and I question God’s plan for myself and why there is so much violence and suffering (Why? I ask) and I beg God to save at least one person from the harm of evil even if it’s just one person. “Please save them,” I cry!! God, there must be something more I can do other than just sitting here holding my Rosary beads and pleading for Your mercy and goodness to stop the violence and evil that’s set upon this world at times.

Sometimes I get upset with God (as I’m imagining some of you reading this may have experienced this also and if so God understands our hearts and remember He’s forgiving, so if you feel like yelling and screaming go ahead, He’s there for you). I truly think God has a plan for me and I know He’s not finished with me, yet.

So each and everything that has happened to me, or you, whether at the time good or bad, we are in the right spot right at this very moment.

I am not much of a movie person, but in some ways, I believe we are all in somewhat of a movie and God is the producer (respectively).

I am a very compassionate person, sometimes to a fault, I see the good in everyone, beauty in everything and I trust easily.  I love deeply beyond words every creature and every human being I come across. I can remember a rude awaking at about 12 years old, as I thought everyone thought as I did and of course what better place: a Catholic School.

I was experiencing some very mean classmates (cruel, if I may) as I was always the “new girl” in class, which didn’t help with bonding with other children very easily. I was shy but kind. It wasn’t until my military father was about to transfer to another military base again, after about 3 years maximum stay, we’d be transferred (sigh).  I finally did get accepted by my classmates. In fact, sometimes becoming the most liked in my class. I practiced turning the other cheek extremely well.

One time, when I was not accepted, I was 12 years old (of all places it was the very Catholic School I thought I’d be immediately accepted into). I thought what a better place to go to school!! I was so excited when I saw the Virgin Mary statue as me, my sister and mother drove by this Catholic Church and school in our new town of Charlevoix, Michigan. I shouted with glee, “Mom!!! I’m going to this School!!” She objected saying “It’s too expensive.” I didn’t give up and she decided to complain to my beloved and very devout Catholic grandmother. WOW, did my mother get an earful! I was quickly signed up, tuition paid, fitted for my Catholic uniform and placed in the school in less than a week.

Well, this certainly didn’t go as I planned it out in my head. Sadly enough, these children would be the worst I had ever encountered. So, to escape the children and their antics, I spent many lunch hours hiding inside the Catholic church and with that I was ridiculed by my classmates for spending time inside the Catholic church for my lunch hour. As I have written earlier, things – even though bad at the time – happen for a reason.

Which brings me back to one of the saddest times in my life, which actually became a good thing. Spending time in the church was my sanctuary and what a better place for me to be spending my time, although I surely didn’t realize this at the time. So to this day, this unfortunate experience was a blessing in disguise, for I love my church and to this day it is my sanctuary.

This story gets better; if I thought God wasn’t there, well He certainly was. All my tears and prayers and “Why me?” were later answered as my mother applied for a job in nursing and was quickly hired at the local hospital, where little did anyone know, she unknowingly and rapidly became best friends with the mother of the most popular girl in my class. It wasn’t long until the popular daughter of this woman put two and two together and I became her best friend, and no one picked on me after that and I became accepted by my peers very quickly after that.

I will end this on this note: If you think God is not watching each and every one of us, He is. Whether it’s good or for whatever reason at the time its bad (Thy will be done), faith, love, determination. Believe in the power of prayer. Don’t give up, no matter what it is, God is planning the best things in life for you. This, I promise you.

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