Are You Mean?

Have you ever consider yourself mean? unless a person is downright cruel, ruthless or they are a psychopath-sociopath without a conscience (no one’s labeling anyone here) at one point or another you may have found yourself doing something that may have been just a bit shy of good behavior towards your partner or another person you’ve run across in your lifetime.

        Be a Lighthouse In the Storm, so others           can follow your Light in their darkness.

                          be kind, thoughtful and

                    most of all love one another.

If you said no to ever being mean then this a good start to re-examine yourself, meaning you may have some things to look at when examining and analyzing yourself or your behavior and possibly come to terms with how you treat or have treated people in the past. Have you ever said something to your partner only to cast it off as ok to say to him or her? but then thinking would you say that to a stranger? or this one, a friend or relative has just told you how you’ve been treated what advice would you give them if they told you what this person had just done to you or said to you?

Have you ever said something to your partner only to cast it off as an ok way to treat him/her? but then thinking would you say that to a stranger? or this one, a friend or relative has just confided in you about someone that has been treating them badly. What advice would you give them if they told you what this person had just said or done to you?

Then the inevitable happens you come across someone that hurts your feelings, either just a bit or has an impact on your life and you feel practically destroyed by it. Did they mean to destroy you? most likely not but that doesn’t help how you’re feeling right?  then you began to rethink things and say to yourself, let’s take a look at what I can do to change my behavior the next time something like this comes to view.

You can make a positive change from someone’s negative behavior by doing some of your own soul searching or whatever you may choose to call it and as you began to rethink things and say to yourself, let’s take a look at what I can do to change my behavior the next time and not hurt someone’s feelings.

What a remarkable breakthrough to make positives from negative behaviors right? I think so. I have come up with a few positive solutions when negative behavior happens. Here they are, I hope this helps. These are some examples of taking negatives and turning them into positives.

  1. When someone gives you a gift no matter how big or small this gift may be, it could be as little as a stone a child found to give you or a wild flower this may happen after you had to scold or correct his/her behavior, are you still upset? take a deep breath and realize this child is giving you a gift no matter what, this gift is coming from this child’s heart and to scoff at this gift is a horrible injustice to this child and he/she may be afraid to ever approach someone after an incident like this comes up, so graciously accept this gift as a beautiful token, appreciate it and move on. while leaving nothing but love and kindness behind.
  2. Has someone ever said something mean to you? step back a second and look at the person then think to yourself, I love this quote “Behind every angry word is a tear” The bible says speak softly when a harsh word is spoken.  I find this to be true in every person I’ve run across. You have no idea what demons that person may be fighting at the time they said or done something that seems unkind or mean.  In my experience, I have practiced this and by the time the incident was over, this person was apologetic and maybe a time or two they shared what was really bothering them. This may not happen every time but its worth a try.
  3. We have all heard the term turn the other cheek, sometimes this is better said than done but if we keep this practice up long enough we can understand and be able to do this more easily.
  4. The next time a person offers you something again take a step back and consider what this may mean to this person to give this gift to you whatever it may be, whatever the cost or how small. As I said above it could be as small as something that they think is great! but did you unknowingly dismiss it as a bad or tasteless gift? or maybe you didn’t realize this person was offering you all they had at the time. This hurts the gift giver more than you can imagine, so maybe next time you can see this and practice being a bit more cautious and grateful.
  5. There are lots of things you can do the next time you’re not feeling your nice cheerful self. after all, we are only human and sometimes we just want to be cranky, mad, upset or whatever it may be that you’re feeling at the time. Try this, Smile even if you don’t want too (yes force yourself to smile) look into a mirror while practicing this exercise and just the look on your face will probably have you laughing in no time. One of the reasons your happier and in a better mood because of this little exercise? is a hormone called Dopamine this hormone is released into your body and increases your ability to fight depression, stress and lowers your heart rate, I could go on about the benefits of just smiling. You may feel a bit silly at first smiling in the mirror at yourself and may even find yourself laughing (Good Job)

So the next time you are faced with an angry situation turn it into a positive and remember your not a bad person because of this, just take a step back and re-examine yourself. You’ll begin to see the results of how you handled a situation as it comes up and see the positive impact it has on the other person you’ve come across and may even improve your relationships. Good Luck and most of all Love one another. God Bless you on your journey to be a better person. You got this!

 

 

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